Bethlett .

131. I really want to write about some struggles I'm facing right now being a new mummy but I don't want to come across miserable alllllll the time because I love being a mum! Do I stay honest and true and just write what I feel or sugar coat the tough stuff and act like it's all okay??? 😕 Sod it!! Now whether this is a hormonal thing or if it's something deeper, the truth is, I am struggling! I've wrote before about wanting a best friend etc but it feels like it's more than that now, I feel, alone! I felt alright for the first few weeks, you are in that new baby bubble, lots of people come to visit and it's all round love but then, like now, there's none of that. This isn't about attention, people work, life is a continuous thing, I guess it's just highlighted my aloneness, my worries and anxieties about everything. I took baby girl for a walk around in her pram this morning and I just kept thinking to myself 'my god I'm so

130. Ironically I'm writing this on mine and my husbands 9 year anniversary (from first going out not marriage)  Relationships are difficult, marriage can be difficult and after a baby, more so. This will be quite honest in places which I'm sure will piss Rob off to no end but look, this is my outlet.  We have never argued so much in our whole 9 years like we have in the past 10 weeks! Our baby girl is our absolute WORLD but yes it has been hard on us! You never get told really that there might be a strain after a baby is born in a relationship, I pictured it to be all wonderful and bliss and the three of us just so in love all the time. I'm not saying I'm not in love all the time! Of course I am! However, what isn't ever mentioned is how tiredness and hormones and emotions can cause absolute tidal waves!  It's so daunting coming home with this little person you have only ever imagined in your mind. All of a sudden they are there, needing you to keep the

129. 8 weeks in, what I've learnt. 1. Making plans becomes a thing of the past! Babies don't work to a time frame, oh no!! If you make a plan and say you'll be somewhere at a particular time, you can bet your arse you won't make it in time! They'll either need a feed or poo, or 9 times out of 10 BOTH. I think I said to my friend I'd meet her at 10am once, an hour later I arrived! Don't get me wrong they'll be those savvy folk out there who have no issues at all with this but me, if I say one time add a good 30-40 mins on top of it!  2. Prioritising what to do. When your wonderful new born baby finally drifts off to sleep it's a toss up on what you do first. Is it eat, pee, shower, clean, sleep or just crash on the sofa and watch a bit of mindless tele to relax. I usually go with Nutella on toast, while the bread is toasting away the kettle is boiling and while that's happening setting up the tele with a recording I made a week a go. I do